|
;
F T Y |
i put on a grrt show with every mask , do applause
DAR-Links |
USELESS
Saturday, 29 September 2007
nobody cares any more, nobody. they depend on me, once. now... I'm useless. they threw me away. now... I'm INVINCIBLE to them. they don't care about me anymore. to them.. I'm useless. all they did was take advantage of me. WHY DO I ALWAYS FALL FOR THEIR TRICKS? MY FRIENDSHIP IS SO BUMMED!
Friday, 21 September 2007
my friendship is so bummed. one minute, I hate her.. the other minute, she was like my BFFL! the more I hate her, the more I'm close to her. the more I try to get away from her, the more I'm with her. now... two groups of friends are fighting over me. one group, the evil. the group I've been trying to get loose from. the other group, the angelic. the good one, whose been trying to help me out of evil. now, I'm in between. what should I do? I can't choose who to go to? someone please help! HELP! someone pls help me!
Wednesday, 19 September 2007
someone please help me! these sorrow cries is too soft. no one could here me. I love him, love him so much. but why, why am I afraid to tell him? now, his friend knows it. he knows I love him. what if? what if he tells him? my sorrow cries are only heard by his friend, not him. can I trust him to keep this secret? he told me its okay if he knows it, why must I be afraid to tell him? I had no answer to his question. the VICTIM
Sunday, 16 September 2007
I am the VICTIM. I was the VICTIM, last year, this year, pass months, and NOW. I'm tired. tired of being the VICTIM. isn't there any other role for me to be? maybe the bystander, the witness maybe? but please.. why VICTIM? why am I always the VICTIM? WHEN IS MY TURN TO BE THE MURDERER?!?! ??? (again)
Thursday, 13 September 2007
today.. I've forgiven her, I don't know, is it really from my heart or did I said that because I don't want her to be sad or disappointed. in my heart, I still hate her. I am still mad at her. I am really angry at her. I'm now in a dilemma of what am I doing and going to do next. my heart is really broken. I don't know how or who can mend it back. At the same time.. I'm wondering, Did she apologized for real? or was it just pretend so that she could do another plan to get on me? 'Cause I know, our friendship will not last long. What the heck is going on?!?!
I don't understand life. not at all. here I am, still in the same position. -the VICTIM why is everyone blaming on me or said it was me who did it? she made the plan, she insisted on doing it even though I refused, but she told the victim of her plan that it was my idea, my plan, all me, ME ME! this is not the 1st time she did this to me. I AM ONE INNOCENCE, DUMB VICTIM! I'M ALWAYS IN THE SAME POSITION EVEN THOUGH I'VE TRIED TO BE THE MURDERER! WHY IS EVERYONE DOING THIS TO ME?! WHY?!?!?! You're Never Better
Sunday, 9 September 2007
you tried everything. and I mean everything. you're never better.. 'cause you're always copying. you tried your best. but its the worst of all. I've overcome my fear, now I'm not afraid of pain, scars, blood. most of all I'm not afraid to fight you, hurt you. I'm not afraid of you anymore. do all you can. just hurt me. I don't have a heart to feel the pain of being hurt. hurt me physically. I don't even care. the sorrow cries.
Wednesday, 5 September 2007
the words she said. were so saddening that I could still hear it in my ears. my cries.. my sorrow cries.. my silent sorrow cries.. no one could hear it. I'm known to be strong and will never cry. I may not cry but.. I am surely to cry in my heart. crying in the inside is more painful than crying on the outside. I don't cry out loud.. but crying silently in your heart really hurt. it is more painful than being hit, kick, slashed, stabbed or being hurt physically. every time I'm sad, hurt, when my heart starts breaking or my heart broke.. all I do is cry silently in my heart.. I know it hurt.. but that is what I always do. Let's just..
I've been writing too much about the person I hate. now lets just pretend they never exists, now its back to my life. maybe.. I am an idiot, I am stupid, I am useless. those are the words that my enemies and mom called me.. what my enemies said was easy to forget. but the words that shot out f my mom's mouth was unforgettable. those words were etched to my mind, it's still fresh like as if she just said it. Have you?
Tuesday, 4 September 2007
have you ever thought of.. how many people hates you? I think you haven't. to you.. everyone loved you.. every boys admire you.. you're popular.. you're teachers pet.. you're the .. smartest cleverest leader ruler and all we were was the people you hated but you took advantage of! don't you know you're the opposite? if you're really the ruler, I wished you're a ruler. if you really were a ruler, I would have broke you into as many pieces as I could and burnt you! since you were 'captain' in netball, you think you could rule our lives. we refused to do what you requested. you cried like you've lost everything in your live. we laughed like hell! you cried harder and asked why we laughed instead of calming her.. the answer is simple.. you laughed at us in our misery.. now its our turn to laugh at you. What a fucking face?
you and your face.. you make that poisoning innocent look. did I tell you how dreadful it looked? oops! I think I never told you so! better not 'cause what you do is revenge and backstabbing. looking at your face. it's too disgusting. it could make me vomit! tell a strange to take one look at your face, I bet he or she will feel like slapping or slashing your face. honestly, that is what I feel. I've slapped your face once. but you thought i was fooling around with you. seriously.. you're the one who's dumb. you're the one who's stupid. I've shown my anger and hate towards you, and you thought I was joking? ouhk then.. if I stab you with a dagger, would you still think I'm joking and fooling around? maybe you do. I've fought you many times.. what did you think I was doing..? I'll leave that to your opinion. Is this feeling true or not?
Sunday, 2 September 2007
I like you.. I like you too.. I like both of you.. but now.. I don't like you.and I like you.. then I like only you.. my feelings are playing with me.. I DON'T CARE.. as long I'M NOT! not a lesbian like they said.. NEVER WILL I!!
now you regret.. now your crying for us.. dying to go back with us.. saying sorry with full regret.. but.. like I said.. I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU! forever will I never forgive you! we gave you to much chances. but all of them are fake cries. even if I die.. in heaven or hell.. NEVER WILL I! I told you.. I will never forgive you. THEM!!!
because of her! because of them! the two most hated one in the universe! they made plans to make us fall. they'd do anything to make us miserable, suffer. and cry.. I'm telling you! you can't make me cry! you can't make me suffer! you can't make my life miserable! you two are useless! you are the one with the smart ass! but.. with no brains in your skull! you laughed at us in our misery. but again.. the one who is in most misery is.. YOU! FATIN AND JANE! ...
fatin and jane.. have you notice this blog is mostly about you two? oh! mind me. you two don't even know about this blog! you two have been hurting people.. you made us felt stupid and dumb! but I think we did worst to you two.. that's good! YOU DESERVE IT! you two are the JINXES! you're both jinx! bringing bad luck to us! you give us trouble and left us with it! I know you two laughed at us with this deadly trouble you troubled us! now.. it's time to see you suffer! just wait and see. fucking leaders..
fatin..jane.. wonder why you two are always leaders. fatin..a captain.. jane..a leader..of god hell stupid damn fucking rules.. I don't understand why you to exists.. okay.. since you do exists. at least.. please..PLEASE I'M BEGGING YOU! GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY LIFE! DON'T EVEN APPEAR IN FRONT OR NEAR ME! Better watch out!
Saturday, 1 September 2007
ouh fatin! and jane.. you both hurt too many people. now, you yourselves must feel how is it to be hurt, now let me hurt you. maybe worst. if I could, I will not only hurt u mentally. But physically as well, you think your beautiful and everyone love you. mind me, your the ugliest girl I've ever met! not only your ugly on the outside, but.. your inside is uglier! now that everyone hate you, what will you do?
|